Dizzy Dee

Our company does a lot of odd jobs in the sense that the projects we’re working on don’t have any relation to each other.

Whilts one of our developers was working on a Norwegian website project, his Norwegian translator went on leave for a week, hence he had to do a bit of translation himself. It didn’t go all bad, and he was actually quite chuffed with himself for completing his work without the translator.

However, upon her return yesterday, she checked the website for any grammer errors while being on a Skype call with our developer. After a few minutes she burst out laughing, and laughed for about 5 minutes non-stop. It turns out that Norwegian can also be a tricky language, as the word which he used for the ‘BACK’ button, translates hysterically enough, into something along the lines of “ARSE”. I guess the word he used was more like backside - LOL.

There was even a help section in which he had used the word, and it read something like this: “If you want to change your delivery address, click the ARSE button”.

ROFL - Translation funnies are still some of my favourite jokes.

I heard the most bizarre thing on the news last night - Demi Moore detoxifying herself with leeches. Disgusting, but when I found the article on the internet this morning, it was even worse than what was said last night:

Demi Moore covers herself in blood-sucking leeches to keep her skin looking fresh.

The actress - who, at 45, is 15 years older than husband Ashton Kutcher - is a huge fan of a detox treatment which involves the unpleasant creatures being placed on her body.

She said: “I feel like I’ve always been someone looking for the cutting edge of things that optimise your health and healing.

“I was in Austria doing a cleanse and part of the treatment was leech therapy.

“These aren’t just swamp leeches though - we are talking about highly trained medical leeches. These are not some low level scavengers - we’re talking high level blood suckers.” (LOL - WTH?)

Demi says she now feels very relaxed and refreshed after her treatments but admits it was quite unnerving to begin with.

She added to US talk show host David Letterman: “It detoxifies your blood - I’m feeling very detoxified right now. I did it in some woman’s house lying on her bed. We did a little sampler first, which is in the belly button.

“It crawls in and you feel it bite down on you and you want to go, ‘You b*****d.’ Then you relax and work on your Lamaze breathing just to kind of relax.

“You watch it swell up on your blood, watching it get fatter and fatter - then when it’s super drunk on your blood it just kind of rolls over like it is stumbling out of the bar.“ … Again, I can just say WTH…

Most celebrities are weird, but this is the cherry on the cake. I can’t believe how dumb people can make themselves look - reminds me of the emperor’s clothes for some reason. As long as everyone thinks Demi’s using the latest detox treatment she’s happy, meantime everyone’s laughing behind her back.

Source: NZ City

I’m struggling with some sort of allergy or sinus something. Whatever it is, I sneeze way too often, and I have too much mucus in my nostrils that what is healthy. I know, too much detail.

The solution for this? I can either take an allergex tablet in the morning, and feel amazing relief from the mucus problem, but walk around like a zombie cause I’m so sleepy, or I can be brave and battle through the mucus and sneezing.

I read on Health24 that hay fever is often treated with antihistamines, but I haven’t been able to find anything that doesn’t make me drowsy.

For now I’m going to try and live with it, hoping that it will blow over soon.

Mortgages is not something that I like talking or writing about. But I guess, if we’re priviledged enough, we all have to face them some time in our lives. I never knew what a hassle it was till I had to go through the whole rig-ma-roll of applying for a mortgage. Here in SA we rather talk about home loans though. Makes more sense though, the word ‘mortgage’ sounds like some car part. LOL.

Anyway, if you need to apply for a morgage, you should check out earth.co.uk. Apparantly they offer reasonable mortgages, and its quite easy to apply.

Good luck!

You may have noticed that I’ve grown very quiet. I’m doing OK. I am busy at work, but not as hectic as I’ve been in the past. The wedding was really amazing, but I’m struggling to get into a work routine at the moment. I guess the early mornings are just a bit hard on me.

And for those of you who want more info, you can mail me

Flights to Canada are now cheaper than ever. Whether you’ve always wanted to see majestic lakes, or if you just have to go to Canada for a business trip, you will find affordable plane tickets on the dial a flight website. They offer a special from March 19th to April 30th 2008 - flying from London to Toronto for only £293.

Canada offers a large variety of tourist attractions, from cosmopolitan cities such as Montreal and Toronto in the Southern parts, to the isolated Eskimo settlements around the icy shores of Hudson Bay.

There are thousands of lakes and rivers of the interior provide superb watersports and fishing, as well as the Atlantic & Pacific oceans. The mountain ranges, such as the Rocky Mountains, offer breathtaking scenery. Some of the best resorts are in the series of great National Parks which preserve the wildlife and forests of Canada. The Northern parts offer the beautiful wilderness, also in National Parks.

Personally I would love to go skiing in Canada. Though I’m not very adventurous, and I might end up falling my arse off, I still do want to try it one day.

These are actual medical reports from a hospital in SA

1. She has no rigors or shaking chills,but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.

2. Patient has chest pains if she lies on her left side for over a year.

3. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.

4. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.

5. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.

6. Discharge ststus: Alive but without my permission.

7. Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.

8. The patient refused an autopsy.

9. The patient has no previous history of suicide.

10. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.

11. Patients medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past 3 days.

12. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

13. She is numb from her toes down.

14. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.

15. The skin was moist and dry.

16. Occasional, constant and infrequent headaches.

17. Patient was alert and unresponsive.

18. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.

19. She stated she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.

20. I saw your patient today who is still under our car for physical therapy.

21. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accomodation.

22. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.

23. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

24. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stock broker instead.

25. Skin: somewhat pale but present.

26. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.

27. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Blank who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.

28. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.

29. Patient has 2 teenage children, but other than that no abnormalities.

Today’s the last day I’ll be writing a personal post as a Miss… When I get back from leave, I will let you know, but then I am going to be a MRS!

I can’t wait for the wedding anymore. There have been some minor complications. People not wanting to sit where we have already arranged for them to sit, and others who RSVP’d who are not coming anymore. Pff… Twats. Anyway, so we have to make some changes.

Tomorrow I’ll be spending the day getting the last few things ready, and I’m going for a pedicure. Then I’m gonna see my sister and her family - they’re coming from Texas - Yay!! Can’t wait.

On Friday we’re setting up the venue. Someone’s going to have to pitch the marquee tent, and setup the gazebo. We’ll be busy with the décor & flower arrangements. I have to remember to pickup the rose petals which I’m going to mix with white duck feathers for confetti, as well as pick up my bouquet. I hope my bouquet comes out the way I want it. I took them a picture from a magazine which I had copied. I’ll add it to this post so you can see [You can click on the pic, it should open a fancy new viewer called Lightbox - I got the idea from Kristyn - thanx Kristyn ;))

I’ve been trying to remind myself that I need to focus on handing over my work stuff, but its pretty hard, specially cause I know these are the last few hours.

I got the cutest e-mail from a colleauge wishing me well for the wedding. I will post it here in a password protected word doc. If you know my surname, you can open it - that’s the password.

Hope you all will survive without me till the 18th of March when I’m back in the office