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Why Teachers Drink

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  1. DC DC
    November 8, 2010    

    I think they should get full marks for creativity!!!

    • k. k.
      June 8, 2011    

      pahahaha! this is so funny! kind of like what i write on my tests when i don’t know the answers. i believe that these kids should recieve points for creativity 😉 and besides, you have to be smart to come up with some of these answers.

  2. November 9, 2010    

    Lot of new ones here.

    Six animals which live in Artic…two polar bears and four seals..LOL

  3. February 9, 2011    

    This is more like what saves teachers from drinking. The 16-year-old I’m tutoring who reads at grade 2.5 … that’s what drives teachers to drink. (And to imagine actions against lower school colleagues that would have most unfortunate consequences if implemented !)

    • taylor taylor
      June 7, 2011    

      You are terrible. Every single teacher should just want to teach each individual as much as they can.
      From one teacher to another

      • Amber Amber
        June 8, 2011    

        Don’t see how she is terrible. She is tutoring a child, which is trying to teach him more. In my opinion, a child getting to age 16 and only reading at a 2.5 level is very sad and the responsibility of all teachers who came before, along with the parents.

        • Clara Clara
          June 21, 2011    

          Just because a 16 year old reads at a 2.5 grade level, doesn’t mean he’s stupid or the school system failed him. My brother has ADD and although his reading level is very low and he has trouble writing, he is an absolute wiz when it comes to maths and sciences.

          • August 22, 2011    

            Nah sorry to say but your brother is just stupid. Having ADD is no excuse. Many people have ADD and excel in all categories. The will to learn is what matters. That and due to recent studies a large portion of intelligence has to do with genetics. However ADD has little to do with it.

        • Amy Amy
          June 22, 2011    

          You are BOTH terrible. Obviously, if the child is 16 and reads at a 2.5 grade level then he or she has some sort of learning impairment. These children need extra help and in some cases are not able to perform better. If the child does NOT have a learning impairment, then it is REALLY sad isn’t it? If you are going to come on the internet and say that this child has driven you to drink, then don’t teach them. Let someone who has a heart for special education teach them. They deserve better than you. You should be ashamed of yourself.

          • July 12, 2011    

            For crying out loud, let’s not be over dramatic. Carrie was merely saying that the flaws in the education system are frustrating enough to *joke* about them driving her to drink. I am sure that every one of us here enjoy teaching or helping others, regardless of the situation. It is human to get frustrated and entirely normal to make comments about that frustration. It is terrible, Taylor and Amy, to get online and criticize others for silly comments made on a page that was meant to be entertaining. If you do not have the presence of mind and understanding of heart to bear this kind of humor, than don’t read the page or the comments. Melodrama on a random page on the internet isn’t helping anyone, thank you.

  4. February 10, 2011    

    Sad that our students are so distracted (by popular culture, for one thing) that they can’t learn basics and are outperformed by other cultures, though I’m thankful that this doesn’t represent all of today’s youth.

    • June 14, 2011    

      well, for one thing its pop culture not popular culture don’t try and sound smarter by writing it out. And for another thing POP culture is not only education but downright brilliant without it I wouldnt get along as well with my peers, wouldnt know how to fist pump or who to smush on a daily basis and thats its not cool to hit girls. Also celebs do alot of good for others like charity work, making cool stores to help the economy and help us with our vocabulary. And that is my essay on way old people shouldnt be on the computer unless they know what they’re talking about

      • Jeff Jeff
        June 15, 2011    

        Thanks Sara for reinforcing what she said and please don’t angst over this too much. Hate to make you upset while you watch Jerseylicious…:)

        • Owen Owen
          June 20, 2011    

          Well, Jeff.. As long as we’re trying to flex nuts about who has the greatest common sense, maybe we should take into account all the people complaining about the level of education we are receiving, and then compare it to the amount of people actually doing something about it. In response to Christine (Original Post), I would like to stress something that you’ve already stated. “…outperformed by other cultures” Yes we are outperformed by other cultures, just as other cultures are sometimes outperformed by us. And here’s the kicker: It’s because of all the cultural differences. Different cultures stress different things, so expecting a relatively new country (The United States) to have the level of cultural importance placed on education by countries like China or Japan is little too high a goal for us right now. Also, take into account that they place so much stress on education, because 1. In China, are you more likely to survive comfortably as a Government scientist, or a sweatshop worker? 2. It’s considered a disgrace to get bad grades in some countries. You shame your entire family. That’s why you hear about so many Asian students committing suicide. Would you rather have your child get average scores and feel successful because he’s still in the game, or would you rather have them get a 3.8 GPA, and kill themselves because they’ve disgraced you?

          Take this into account the next time you pick and choose cultural “flaws”. After all, my generation reflects the teachings of the generation before me.

          • June 27, 2011    

            @ Owen.
            So ignorance breeds ignorance? Therefore, let’s blame the previous generations for the problems of today’s youth. You’re basically saying that America is doomed if that’s your theory? I don’t subscribe to that at all; the fact that the US is a young nation bears no reflection on the cultural importance of education. The real causes of the problems lie in the complacency associated with being a rich and powerful nation. Maybe this economic downturn is just what America needed to reinvigorate the youth and encourage reforms in the education system. America’s culture is not flawed, its people are arguably the most innovative and creative in the world. To say that “my generation reflects the teaching of the generation before” is a blatant cop out! America is falling behind because innovation is the mother of necessity. The same thing is happening here in Australia. Today’s youth are ignorant and lazy because the natural competitive pressure to succeed is just not there. This is not a reflection on culture; this is a reflection of life circumstances.

          • bob bob
            August 2, 2011    

            lol…seriously…lol..the fact that our nation is “young” is why we don’t stress education…wow

      • June 27, 2011    

        hahaha, Sara, I hope that was intentional brilliance on your part?

  5. Josh Josh
    March 3, 2011    

    Actually it represents a vast majority of todays youth,especially in amerika. Over half of them can not locate the pacific ocean ON A MAP!! The youth of today grow more and more ignorant and dumb as each minute ticks by…Idiocracy was not a comedy film…Its a documentary about the future. Our world falls apart everyday and it erodes around the feet of a generation of ego filled hipsters and lame ducks who hold their phones in higher regard than life. Our children are stupid and their stupidity is rewarded. If your child is not up to par than maybe it should be left behind.

    • nick nick
      June 5, 2011    

      You sir, are ignorant and dumb. Over 1/2 of us can’t find the Pacific Ocean on a map? Are you retarded? Of course most of us can you dumbass. Only the select few can’t locate it, and most of those kids probably just don’t care. If you think that we are getting dumber, then you are dumb, because you listen to random statistics and don’t actually spend time learning the truth. It can be argued that we are getting lazier, since I pointed out that many don’t care. But that doesn’t represent all of us, it doesn’t even represent most of us. At my high school, over 50% (YES,50%) of students do sports, and in order to do sports you must pass all of your classes, so therefore, these kids must work hard, and be intelligent, or we wouldnt be able to balance these two acts. You sir, are an ignorant douche-bag. Go enjoy your career at Chuckie-Cheese.

      • July 24, 2011    

        I agree with Josh. During a test, recently conducted to 180 undergrad students in a college, more than 110 did not know where Greenland is and more than 95 did not know where Iran is. Additionally 56 to be precise did not know where pacific ocean is!!! So think/read/know before you open your trap, Nick!

        And Jo, America can be pronounced in 8 ways, for your kind information. it depends on which country you are from…America, Amerika, Amrica, Amrika, Amarica, Americah, Amayrica, Americka,

      • August 5, 2011    

        Bravo to that. I cant believe how people cant just enjoy a simple list of funny answers that kids put on a test. Its simple and funny but of course you have the usual jack asses that have to get all literal and try to sound like they know what the hell theyre talking about. Alls I can say is a big F*** You to Josh and a big thank you to Nick!

    • Jo Jo
      June 6, 2011    

      I am 14 years old and I think your comment is the funniest thing ever…. America is spelt with a c not a k so the fact that you are calling the youth of today stupid and ignorant is very ironic right? and were not stupid in any way, you think a stupid kid would be able to come up with any of those smart ass answers? I think not. Point proven.

      • Jenn Jenn
        June 10, 2011    

        I agree with Jo. I’m 15 and most of my friends and I have better grammar than Josh. Haha and Jeremy I love you(: The kids that came up with these answers are not stupid. They came up with creative solutions to questions they did not know or didn’t deem important enough to be worth solving. I’m not advocating for this, but Josh’s comments are way out of line and calling “amerika” (you must mean America) stupid because of a few joke answers on the internet is beyond ignorant.

        • July 24, 2011    

          Remember that he said it can be PRONOUNCED 8 ways…. not SPELLT (spelled) 8 ways.

          The ignorance is in these awful rants you guys are writing to one another. Albeit, they’re very entertaining :)

    • Caoimhe Caoimhe
      June 9, 2011    

      Your punctuation and grammar is priceless. America would be correct and also it’s spelled then maybe, not than maybe. The fact that you are trying to sound so formal makes you look arrogant, so please don’t call us ignorant. Last but not least don’t refer to other people’s children as an it. Cheers. :)

    • Leslie Leslie
      June 9, 2011    

      I’m going to call bullshit. It’s completely ridiculous to say over half of American children can’t locate the Pacific Ocean on a map. Furthermore, it’s absolutely ridiculous to say, “If your child is not up to par than maybe it should be left behind.” Not only is the grammar incorrect but a child shouldn’t be left behind simply because he or she may not be smart. Everyone is talented somehow. I know someone who isn’t very smart but is very musically inclined. Leaving a child behind because they lack in intellect is terrible. Some cannot help it and the children that can were probably raised very poorly and it is then the fault of the parents or guardians as opposed to the children themselves.

      • July 24, 2011    

        I am a teacher and YES, many students attending high-need schools do not know basic geography.

        Should they be left behind? ABSOLUTELY. If you were a teacher, would you (in your heart of hearts) feel that a student should be passed when they are not reading at grade-level, cannot write a sentence to save their lives, and cannot locate a country on a map (the basic of basics). Nix that… what if there was a fire in the building and that person couldn’t read “pull here” in order to activate a fire alarm or the sprinkler system.

        As a teacher, I would gladly leave behind my students over and over again until they learn what they have to learn to function in this society and be able to compete in the job market. I am sorry for wanting success for my students and not wanting them to end up in jail for the dumbest reasons.

        I have until 21 years old, which is the age high school students can no longer attend high school. I will leave them behind up until that time, if that’s what it takes.

    • Brian Brian
      June 14, 2011    

      Before you go criticizing our generation, don’t forget who raised it.

      • Lala Lala
        June 15, 2011    

        I would just like to post a little quote right about now.
        “When I was about 5 years old my mother used to say that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school I was asked to write down what I wanted to be when I grew up, I wrote ‘happy’. The teachers told me I didn’t understand the assignment, I told them they didn’t understand life.”

        Who cares if you don’t seem smart to someone? As long as you are living your life to the fullest and smiling, enjoying every minute of it, then I’d say that you are far more intelligent than most. :)

      • July 24, 2011    

        Well put, Brian

    • Adeducator Adeducator
      June 16, 2011    

      You talk about stupidity and you are even unable to spell America correctly. Where did you go to school? My experience as a teacher was that the administration would not back me up. And then of course you have the parents that believe that their children can do no wrong.
      I find it sad that we cut teachers when the children are the future. I also find it sad that everyone says that we are overpaid. I know I got to my classroom at 7 and stayed till 5. Then I went home and spent another 4 or 5 hours grading papers and preparing lessons. Then what do most teachers do during the summer? Most spend their own money to go to school to learn new techniques to teach YOUR children. The starting pay of a teacher in Illinois is less than $20k. I left the middle school position to teach adult schzophenics. They were more attentive, better behaved, and I didn’t have to deal with overbearing parents, telling me that it was my job to make sure that their children learn. How many times did they sit down with their children and help them with their homework? Don’t blame it all on the teachers that have a 52 student classroom. Try working with your kids yourself.

    • Marissa Marissa
      June 18, 2011    

      “If your child is not up to par than maybe it should be left behind.”

      If that’s the case, then someone should have left you behind.

    • Miss America Miss America
      June 20, 2011    

      I know why they can’t locate it on a map– http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lj3iNxZ8Dww

    • July 4, 2011    

      Aw, I didn’t see anyone call out the “Its a documentary…” grammar flub. I mean, besides the fact that it’s not. But he should have said “It’s” as in “it is” This is fun, what else can we pick apart?

      “Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish on its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” – Albert Einstein

    • July 20, 2011    

      “Over half of them can not locate the pacific ocean ON A MAP!!”
      But only a complete idiot thinks that America is spelled with a “c,” not a “k.”
      Maybe you should educate yourself before ranting about the youth (or perhaps YOU were not up to par, and were left behind).

      In fact, I am generous enough to go through your post and teach you about basic, elementary-level grammar, spelling, and punctuation rules:

      1. Missing comma after “Actually”
      2. Missing apostrophe in “todays” (should be “today’s)
      3. “amerika” should, in fact, be capitalized and spelled correctly (America)
      4. “pacific ocean,” being a proper noun, should also be capitalized (Pacific Ocean)
      5. The names of movies are always either underlined or italicized
      6. “ego filled hipsters” should be “ego-filled hipsters”

      Hope you enjoyed the English lesson; you’re welcome,
      Robert

  6. Jeremy Jeremy
    March 3, 2011    

    *There should be a comma after the word “Actually” and a space between the comma after the word “youth” and the word “especially”
    *America
    *Pacific Ocean is a proper noun.
    *the ellipses are entirely unnecessary
    *Idiocracy was, in fact, a comedy. A “documentary about the future” is literally impossible to make.
    *”Our world falls apart everyday and it erodes around the feet of a generation…” (note the correct use of ellipses) makes very little, if any sense. Are you trying to be poetic here? Oh, and “everyday” is different from “every day.” In this context, you want to use “every day.”
    *You should use “then” not “than” in your last sentence

    • Caoimhe Caoimhe
      June 9, 2011    

      Epic 😛

    • kk kk
      June 9, 2011    

      Thank you. You saved me from having to write the SAME thing.

  7. Peter Peter
    March 4, 2011    

    These jokes have been around for a while – and I believe I read somewhere some time ago they were written by an actual writer – not a bunch of kids. After all – do you know kids with handwriting that nice? I wouldn’t despair too much over our youth. They know more than we ever will.

  8. Mimi Mimi
    March 9, 2011    

    Jeremy, … I love you 😀

  9. Al Al
    April 8, 2011    

    Jeremy FTW!

  10. Brian Brian
    April 8, 2011    

    I think I do too.

  11. Matthew Matthew
    April 8, 2011    

    guys, its the same person over and over. The handwriting is the same.

    • scott scott
      June 17, 2011    

      Matthew, it is a font to make it readable, not the original.

  12. Also Jeremy Also Jeremy
    April 22, 2011    

    Jeremy, you can’t even imagine how proud I am to share a name with you.

  13. MizLona MizLona
    April 22, 2011    

    Jeremy – you are wonderful. One little addition, though: “cannot” is one word.

  14. Bora Bora
    April 22, 2011    

    Jeremy, you forgot to mention that “cannot” is one word not two 😛

  15. Marshal Marshal
    April 23, 2011    

    Are you blind? The handwriting changes several times. Either the writer is good at faking multiple writing styles, or it’s different people. I wouldn’t put it past the average highschooler that’s beyond the point where fucks are given to come up with answers of this nature.

  16. Barbara Barbara
    April 23, 2011    

    A few of these are real. The rest are not. Here’s a page of handwriting fonts, where you can find several used here (such as “alphabetized cassette” and Otto):
    http://www.1001fonts.com/fonts_overview.html?page=1&category_id=11

  17. Mark Mark
    April 23, 2011    

    @Josh and Matthew (and Jeremy, by omission of correction):

    It’s, not its. “It’s” is short for “it is”–which is the contraction you were using. “Its” is a possessive adjective of a (linguistically) gender-neutral object. It’s *really* not that hard to tell the difference, guys.

  18. Meg Meg
    April 23, 2011    

    Not true, if you look closely there are some very distinguishing differences in the characteristics of the different handwriting samples. In fact, I believe the person who wrote the word “Malaria” was left handed.

  19. April 23, 2011    

    They are not all the same person. The handwriting is not the same. Compare the H’s in ‘Hadrian’s garden’ and ‘He says goodbye’.
    I could give similar examples from my own experience. They are examples of divergent thinking, literal thinking, and ‘incorrect’ but clever thinking. It’s problematic to expect accuracy, neatness and speed when drilling and killing (with tests) every hour of every day of every year throughout compulsory eduction.
    I’ve been working in education since 2001. It’s unfortunate that many disparage the kids/ their parents, and the media/ games/ technology. Students are coping and evolving faster than we can, apparently, change the curriculum to stay relevant.
    Is it relevant to find the Pacific Ocean on a map? In fact, are any of the questions they answered “wrong” relevant to a k-12 student?

  20. April 23, 2011    

    Now I know why I found algebra so difficult.

  21. April 23, 2011    

    Now I know why I found algebra so difficult

  22. Julie Julie
    April 23, 2011    

    Thank you Jeremy, and matthew I’m sure the answers were done on a computer or rewritten for the purpose of this site. Teachers don’t just send their students work out to be posted online every time a new one comes in.

  23. Kendrick Kendrick
    April 23, 2011    

    Jeremy FTW! I was going to comment on his atrocious writing, and how incredibly ironic it was, but you masterfully did so already.

  24. person person
    April 24, 2011    

    @matthew

    the handwriting is not the same compare the letters to the letters in other samples. For example the s’s in the first and third samples are completely different

  25. ELF-IS ELF-IS
    April 24, 2011    

    @ Jeremy.
    * You forgot to put a full stop after the word ‘Sentence’ You big headed ‘Gobshite’ .

  26. April 24, 2011    

    That isn’t handwriting
    Those are among the most common “handwritten” fonts
    And it’s true, most, if not all of these were not written by kids
    Still, they are quite funny

  27. Kate Kate
    April 24, 2011    

    This is hil-ar-i-ous

  28. Who knows Who knows
    April 24, 2011    

    Did it ever occur to any one of you that Josh might be foreign? Though this might not be the case, there’s a world outside of America, you know. I’m Dutch, for instance, but I don’t ignorantly expect each and every one of you to master the Dutch language. That would be absurd, right? Then why would you rather be a bore and whine about his grammar instead of just reading what he is trying to convey?

  29. Shay Shay
    April 24, 2011    

    Those who insult and criticize the younger generations forget who raised it.

  30. April 24, 2011    

    Jeremy, … I wet my pants thank you :) oh and covered my laptop in Dr. Pepper

  31. April 24, 2011    

    the romeo 1 was a legit answer

    • kk kk
      June 9, 2011    

      I agree.

  32. Emily Emily
    April 24, 2011    

    @Who knows

    I think the point of over-correcting Josh’s post was that what ‘he is trying to convey’ makes little to no sense. If he had made a relevant point, his grammar wouldn’t have been attacked.

    @Jeremy – thanks for putting the idiots in their place.

  33. April 24, 2011    

    You can find the writer of most of these at bannination.com

  34. Mike Mike
    April 25, 2011    

    Was Jeremy actually commenting on the poor grammar? Or was he just making a list of things Josh did incorrectly? I think Josh effectively makes his point that “amerika’s” youth seem to be getting less intelligent. He is merely giving an example of a failed education. No need to pick apart every last little detail of an online comment. It’s a bit over-the-top and it kind of makes you sound like a d-bag.

  35. Melody Melody
    April 25, 2011    

    They are not all the same writer, but they are a series of the same writer. The handwriting makes it more than obvious that these answers are not pulled from children’s tests and quizzes, but rather, are computer generated.

    Jeremy, I also love you.

    To the Dutch person called ‘Who Knows’, it doesn’t matter if Josh is foreign. The irony is that he himself is whining about how children these days are incapable of the simplest things, while he is demonstrating poor skills in the same areas as some of the ‘children’ represented above.

    • Jessie Jessie
      June 9, 2011    

      I think it’s relevant to know if Josh is foreign or not, I’m and I know my English isn’t that good. There are some people like Jeremy who only want to see the errors someone made and not the meaning of what is said or written. Everyone can correct grammar or spelling if they want to and are focussed! when I look sometimes at chatrooms in English (and other languages too) I can see too all the incorrect grammar and spelling, so don’t be such a hypocrite. I would like to see everyone that found fault with the text of Josh to write a hole coherent and understandable text in another language and see how good they can do that! I think speaking and understanding (even a bit) other languages is great, not everyone has that chance, or has the (poor) skill (as you said it) to make himself understandable!

  36. Umair Umair
    April 25, 2011    

    ROFL. They all should be given some distinction on such creation and apparently right answers. Very funny!

  37. N/A N/A
    April 25, 2011    

    Just saying the majority of these were shopped.

  38. April 25, 2011    

    They should all get an A++ for creativity

  39. Andrea Andrea
    April 25, 2011    

    I think what Jeremy wrote was a complete zing. Josh completely trashed the Americans saying we are dumb basically and Jeremy totally zinged him. I know there are other words but this is an absolute zing. So everyone who is saying Jeremy is mean and blah blah blah he is just proving Josh wrong that we aren’t hopeless. Also proving the awful sterotype that Americans have wrong. All in all, Haters gonna Hate!

  40. June June
    April 25, 2011    

    I fully agree with Mike Hawke, the Romeo one was completely true. I hated that play because of the characters’ inability to change.

  41. Grazer Grazer
    April 26, 2011    

    My friend Phillip got this on a maths sheet:

    “During the first half, the Tigers get 4 points and the Seals get 8. In the second half, the Tigers get 7 points and the Seals get 5. Who’s winning?”

    “Charlie Sheen”

  42. Shayne Shayne
    April 26, 2011    

    Well it may represent a vast majority of today’s teens and other school-goers but you shouldn’t stereotype them into an “idiocracy” group….

    I’m in HS and the state/ school funds sports with a new baseball complex with 4 fields and a million dollar football field and track…. But won’t an advanced problem solving, or other educational classes….

    I’m sort of a special case considering my IQ is ranked higher than my peers’ and may be able to learn more easily but “Amerika’s” future is not Idiocracy.

  43. Blugyblug Blugyblug
    April 26, 2011    

    ITT: People who think they’re “smart” and “witty” by pointing out stupid grammatical errors.

    Great job at avoiding his actual argument and instead attacking the way he presses buttons.

  44. Anon Anon
    April 26, 2011    

    I like how half of the comments are about grammar and not the actual pictures.
    (INB4: people try to make themselves feel smarter by pointing out that my comment is one of them)

    Anyway, I’m 15 and teens are nothing like what Josh said. When we’re fooling around on trains/pathways we look dumb but he’s just exagerrating.

    And if this represents a vast majority of youth it’s probably a good thing; these are hilarious.

  45. Morgan Morgan
    April 26, 2011    

    Thank you Jeremy!! I’m 15 and I can comprehend books that a sophomore in college reads, so to say “The youth of today grow more and more ignorant and dumb as each minute ticks by” Is as completely incompetent as the author who wrote it. Also, you said dumb and ignorant it the same sentence, don’t they mean the same thing? Way to repeat yourself as you strive to sound more intelligent then you actually are. Oh and don’t even get me started on your social skills. Have you ever watched the Big Bang Theory? If you have then that’s good, if you haven’t Google it. Anyway you remind me of Sheldon except your stupid, but you have the same social skills. Well I’m done because people like you disgust me. Oh one last thing, before you try to say something like that, check over your grammar because you made quite a few mistakes.

    • Jessie Jessie
      June 9, 2011    

      you should do that too, checking your grammar, I can see at least 2 mistakes if you want to play the game that way! if you think you’re way better in grammar then I expect that you can write in perfect grammer, you don’t, so I think you’re hypocrite!

  46. Alex Alex
    April 27, 2011    

    despite all of these controversial, immature, and pointless comments (i am 15 by the way) your views are all biased as the republican party. the world is changing and that is a fact. the past and the future are no where near similar, and having a grudge against kids for being into technology is.. childish. the world is changing, yes, but we have to change with at and people have to learn to accept and come together. not argue like complete morons.

  47. Kyle Kyle
    April 27, 2011    

    @ Josh

    These are clever answers. The youth of today is by no means any more dumb than the youth of past generations. Also where do you get your facts? America is behind most developed countries in math skills but just as good, if not better in every other. Most youth can find the Pacific ocean. Also why did you capitalize “ON A MAP!!!”? Where you saying that there are harder ways to point out that you know where an ocean is?

    To close I just have to ask, if the youth of America are all really as fucked up as Josh claims then the generation ahead of us is to blame. Based off of what I have observed in the world they have done alright, yeah some kids are dumb but some adults are too.

    I’m a senior in high school and I don’t know a single person in my class who is half as dumb as Josh believes most American youth are.

    • Josh (American) lol Josh (American) lol
      June 18, 2011    

      I just want to say that the reason America is behind other countries is that are so focused on forcing kids to work hard in school that those kids don’t actually live their childhood. Kids in America can keep up with them and still have an actual life. This is an article about kids in China. Everyone should be happy that our kids can have a bit of fun. Also, of course in chat rooms people will have poor grammar, its for chat, not deep intellectual conversations.

      http://www.chinadaily.com.cn/china/2007-05/13/content_871182.htm

  48. Gontan Gontan
    April 27, 2011    

    I just like the fact that Josh decided to say “represents a vast majority of todays youth,especially in amerika.” Especially in America huh? And to Who Knows, we understand that he may be foreign, but if he is going to go and insult people from the United States (seeing as how we are the United States of America, and not America) then he should at least try to do so in a semi legible manner…

  49. I'm Jeremy Too (and Josh) I'm Jeremy Too (and Josh)
    April 27, 2011    

    IMO most teachers are hittin the crack pipe…..

  50. Wie Nabowtit Wie Nabowtit
    April 27, 2011    

    Wit is quickly becoming a lost art. These kids’ answers to most of these questions show more intelligence than the correct answers would reveal. Thinking outside the box is what allows our world to advance.

  51. Twixy Twixy
    April 27, 2011    

    ahahaha this made my day. i think these kids were just a buncha smart alecs :p

  52. April 27, 2011    

    good god some of these were funny! The “Tracey Says” is fantastic.

  53. April 27, 2011    

    I’ve noticed that quite a few people think that the handwriting does not resemble the handwriting of a child. I just thought I’d mention that I don’t believe that the questions above were written for children. They look more to me like high school exam questions and although people in high school are still children, I should think that they can write pretty well. I have been able to write neatly since I was about 10 years old and have maintained the same hand writing style since I was 15 (although I do pick up the occasional flair!)

    The other thing I noticed was that there seems to be alot of criticism about American students. Being British myself, I can say that the same type of questions appear on British papers, and you will come accross the same kind of answers.

    Lastly, MOST of the children/youths/whatever that wrote the answers above are/were probably not entirely stupid but more likely, sarcastic, think they’re being clever and looking for a laugh. There was a boy in my class that wrote “Only smarties have the answer” (The slogan of the UK chocolate, smarties) on the front of his Welsh exam,and that was it! (Still makes me laugh now, when I think about it – and that’s why he did it) If they really wanted to get a good grade then they would TRY and get one!

  54. Caitlin Caitlin
    April 27, 2011    

    I think that new generations are having trouble learning grammar and spelling, but that is because of technology. Everything these days does it for us. We have spell check to spell our words and the internet to find our answers. We don’t even do our own math calculations anymore; we have to use a calculator for everything, even for simple math. I do see a problem but it is nothing we cannot fix. This article should not be called reasons why teachers think. We need teachers around, and to help out our youth. We don’t need an adult influencing alcoholism. I live in a city where children in elementary school are taking drugs and drinking. They are wasting their lives away. We need people to inspire them, not make fun of them.
    Look at all the comments above. They are all about accusing and embarrassing people around them. So what if Josh’s spelling is wrong; it gives no excuse to bash his opinion. It is a discussion and that is it. No reason to get personal. Who cares if the writing is about is fake or not; its purpose is to create some laughs and that is what it did. Let it be.

  55. I enjoyed it. I enjoyed it.
    April 27, 2011    

    Some of my best students, if they do not know the answer, will try to make me laugh with clever comments. I appreciate it. I could see several of them writing these answers, particularly the Romeo “self, self, self” comment (And is it so wrong, anyway? Romeo is one hell of a static–and self-absorbed–character.) These answers don’t represent the majority of my students. If my students truly don’t know the answer and aren’t creative thinkers, they leave it blank or write IDK.

    So, let’s all have a laugh at witty answers that were probably created just for that–entertainment. The true sadness is witnessing a child who has not made it through the system with a basic grasp of reading, or a student who is in high school and can’t work out basic math problems. The worst, however, is a student who can’t think critically beyond a multiple-choice assessment and is about to go out into the world.

  56. Julia Julia
    April 27, 2011    

    Has it ever occured to any one of you that maybe, when the exams were scanned, they turned out to be of poor resolution, hence the caligraphy type font?! And stop criticizing ‘youth these days’ who hasnt ever went to an exam unprepared? The answeres they gave is just a creative way to fail something you were already bound to fail. Compare some of these answers to the hundreds of exams they still have to face throughout there whole life! Seriously, you all have to lighten up! The real problem with society arent the youth, but those people that have there head stuck way to far up there ass and care to much about everything instead of enjoying the moments!
    And stop criticizing people on their spelling mistakes, this is the fucking internet with keyboards and buttons, this isnt a written exam, im brazillian and probablly have a few mistakes myself, whats important is what i have to say, and not the few bumps i hit along that process.

  57. Marcus Marcus
    April 27, 2011    

    It seems like Josh was being sarcastic and in doing so, making fun of Christine. If that’s the case, I agree. It’s pretty pretentious of her to criticize these pictures, whether they are real or a joke. Most of these examples do demonstrate real intelligence and creativity in the answers and are funny as hell. Get a sense of humors guys.

  58. April 28, 2011    

    A) lighten up people and dont be so serious when reading these. B) before you criticize one generation, remember there is always a generation that raised them.

  59. Daniel Daniel
    April 28, 2011    

    Good job Jeremy, was just about to call the idiot out on whether or not he filled this out. And this is very clearly a joke, there are a lot of problems with schooling but with teacher’s wages they don’t really care as much if students learn, and parents need to help more also.

  60. lids lids
    April 28, 2011    

    ahhhhhwwwwssssssoommee!!

  61. April 28, 2011    

    I am a teacher…

    Therefore, I drink.

    -Jeeem-

  62. Em Em
    April 28, 2011    

    I have seen far too many answers similar to these to believe that they weren’t at least based on real answers at some point. However, at least these students attempted to connect to topic in their answer. I have many students who will write instead “idk”.

    But, no matter how wonderful and creative these are, there is still an expectation for students to learn some basic knowledge as a basis for other skills.

  63. Julia Julia
    April 28, 2011    

    Did anyone else notice that Josh actually refers to “your child” as “it?” WTF

  64. 'stupid' youth 'stupid' youth
    April 28, 2011    

    @Mike – Jeremy was responding to what Josh said in his post by proving that his intellect isn’t flawless either.
    @Jeremy – Thank you so much for that. As i was reading that post, I was thinking about how wrong Josh was.

    There seems to be a horrible stereotype about the kids in school right now saying that we are all basically idiots. Although I must admit that there are some people that fit that, a lot of us actually work hard to get good grades and become smarter. School is actually very competitive and the students that push themselves, work ridiculously hard to keep up with some of the other students.

  65. A 15 Yr Old A 15 Yr Old
    April 28, 2011    

    Most of these answers are just kids mucking around.
    I agree that there are a lot of stupid kids these days but that’s no different to any other generation, there’s always been stupid people. So anyway What the hell is with the vast population of “Grammar Nazis” on the internet? Grammar never seemed to matter all that much? Is it just a way of trying to find things wrong with each other?
    Anyways I’m disappointed in you older generations!

  66. martin martin
    April 28, 2011    

    @julia he’s probably German – das Kind; girls a neuter too das Maedchen

  67. Jennifer Jennifer
    April 28, 2011    

    There is no possible way that these were typewritten in any sort of “handwriting” font. (It is possible that some of the answers were written by the same person or that a comedian, not students, wrote them, but they are handwritten.) Compare the reoccurring letters in each answer; they all have slight variations which fonts do not allow. If the answers were typewritten, even with a “handwriting” font, every letter is exactly the same every single time it is typed.

  68. Jennifer Jennifer
    April 28, 2011    

    I should say, “every letter would be exactly the same every time it is typed.”

  69. April 29, 2011    

    @Josh:

    you’re an ass, dude. chill out.

  70. john john
    April 29, 2011    

    most of these answers are technically right

  71. MAr MAr
    April 29, 2011    

    This is funny.
    And those comments are funny too.

  72. April 30, 2011    

    Oh my God I hate it when non-Americans claim that Americans are so ignorant of everything that is going on in the world, and that Americans are so stupid. Americans are seen as stupid people because the stupid Americans are widely displayed in the media. For instance, the show “The Jersey Shore” exploits the lives of low-life fools who pride themselves on their stupidity. The rest of the world sees a show like “The Jersey Shore” and assumes that many or most Americans are like this when, in reality, Americans actually enjoy watching idiots because we find it entertaining that people can be so stupid. I may be getting a little bit redundant here so i will end my comment

    • July 23, 2011    

      What do you think of Americans like me criticizing my own country? People who argue so adamnantly that we’re smarter than the media portrays us needs to open their eyes. I’m a high school student and to be honest, by the end of the geography class I took in freshman year, most of the other students probably wouldn’t be able to find the pacific ocean on a map. That’s especially sad seeing as it was a mixed grade class, and the majority of the students were seniors. There was also a girl who, when given ten pennies read the question “How tall would a stack of one hundred pennies be?” and turned to me to say (non-sarcastically) “How am I supposed to do this? I don’t have a hundred pennies!” I helped her out, but I couldn’t help but wonder whether the fact that a kindergarden question like that was on a high school worksheet, or that a high school student didn’t have the mental processing skills to figure out how to answer it correctly on her own. Truth be told, people aren’t completely incorrect when they point out that it was the generation before us that is teaching us these bad habits because truthfully, I often wonder if some of my teachers are qualified to teach us in the first place.

  73. Jaime Jaime
    May 1, 2011    

    I’m PRETTY sure….that some of these are mine…>_>

  74. Another 15 Yr Old Kid Another 15 Yr Old Kid
    May 2, 2011    

    Lol at the people (adults/teachers) that take this seriously. I’m pretty sure 80% of these kids were messing around when they put their answers.

    @#55, Caitlin
    Actually, technology has definitely improved my maturity, grammar, and outlook on life. This is because I’m actively involved in forums and things like this. Of course there are those select few. About the computer spell-check thing, that is actually a good thing. If I write on an essay “skool”, I’ve obviously spelled it wrong. If I go home and type in “skool” on my computer, it will spell check it and ultimately I’ll now know how to spell the word. If I didn’t have said spell checker at my disposable, I would just write “skool” on my next essay. See where I’m going?

    And one more thing, I doubt you already have elementary school kids actively participating in drugs and alcohol. That is considering your elementary school is grads K-5. Do you really think a 3rd grader knows how to roll a joint?

    Just my two cents.

  75. DJ DJ
    May 2, 2011    

    I find it amusing, that most of you will read one comment, then post to it, before reading other comments that basically say the same thing. Congradulations on continuing the irony of intelligence. (For those of you who don’t know, it’s all relative.) This comment was not meant to be mean or judging, but to simply declare my feelings on the matter. I dare say, an opinion. For those of you trying to read this to find grammatical errors as to one-up me, bravo. Sincerely,
    DJ
    P.S. If any of you know what P.S. stands for, as it is an old term, than I applaud you.
    P.P.S. This has gotten to be quite long, hasn’t it?

    • July 23, 2011    

      I’ve known since I was a little kid that “P.S.” stands for “post script,” so before mounting that high horse of yours you should probably stop judging people you haven’t met.

  76. DJ DJ
    May 2, 2011    

    Oh, and I do think it would be wise to point out, that Josh said: that a vast majority of today’s youth are idiotic, especially in America; not only in America. There are many “bright” people who surprise us all over the world, and in all time periods too. He wasn’t hating on America, just pointing out the facts, no matter how twisted they may have seemed. Bravo Josh, you were the first one to pull that card out of all of these people.

  77. Catherine Catherine
    May 2, 2011    

    Don’t complain about a stupid generation of youth. You’re the ones who raised them.

  78. Juanito140 Juanito140
    May 2, 2011    

    The one tht said bcuz shes a woman should get double credit

  79. Ian L. Ian L.
    May 2, 2011    

    You can tell that many of these are fake, as they use the same “handwritten” font

  80. Daniel Daniel
    May 2, 2011    

    anything wrong?

  81. pixie pixie
    May 2, 2011    

    is this even true??! bt it is fynny

  82. Ben Ben
    May 2, 2011    

    Shayne, your peers must have tragically low IQs if you’re above average at your school.

  83. European European
    May 2, 2011    

    This entire thread, actually, gives credence to what Josh was saying about Americans. The most impressive retort was one that focused on spelling? This is impressive? Facts do not have agendas nor do they have biases. It is a fact that Americans are ranked far lower than most other first world nations in education, among other things. The sad part is that most Americans seem to be content with their ignorance. There are even those (some in powerful positions, mind) that boast of how much they eschew academia and the intelligentsia. They see it as a good thing, as it were!

  84. Bill Bill
    May 2, 2011    

    i think one reason America seems to rank low when com[ared to other cultures is because in America everyone goes to school. This is not true every where.

  85. Andy Andy
    May 2, 2011    

    lighten up. These are funny whether made up by kids or adults. When I was in school I answered the question My personal best along those lines?  “Why was the invention of the cotton gin significant?”  “Because then the settlers could make their own whiskey.”  (Really, I did. And I was surprised it was wrong.  It turns out you CAN learn something by reading the book…).
    If you like these, look for a book called “Then Some Other Stuff Happened” which is pretty much the whole of American history told this way. It might be out of print, but it’s one of the funniest things I’ve ever read.

  86. Brooke Brooke
    May 2, 2011    

    This goes out to the fellow who thinks all these clever answers were created by “lame ducks who hold their phones in higher regard than life.”

    Have you ever thought about this… Maybe these students got every other question on the test correct and just so happened to blank on one of the answers. So, because they already knew that they were going to get it marked wrong, decided to come up with a clever,funny response instead of leaving it blank.

    I don’t know that this is deffinatly the case, but it’s a possibility. Don’t be so quick to judge.

  87. jerry jerry
    May 2, 2011    

    no people think most Americans are stupid because they are ignorant. Ask a group of random Americans what the capital of Canada is or ask them “how many states Canada has” I bet 6 out 10 wont know the first and only four would be able to know that Canada has provinces. And its not just fact about Canada ask Americans about there own history and they half could not name one person who signed the declaration of independence, so ya most Amerians are stupid.

    • Amanda Amanda
      June 19, 2011    

      For your information Jerry, Americans are not ignorant. I’m an American who just graduated from high school and I can answer all of your little questions.The capital of Canada is Ottawa, even my eight year-old sister knows that. There are ten provinces in Canada, I knew they were called provinces even before I read that part of your comment. The Declaration of Independance has 56 signatures on it, I don’t know any American who couldn’t name one of them. John Hancock, Thomas Jefferson, and John Adams are the most commonly known. Please don’t make ignorant generalizations about a bunch of people you’ve never even met. Sure in America there are people who are ignorant and don’t care, but that’s not all of Americans and you wont only find those people in America.

  88. Andrew Andrew
    May 2, 2011    

    Americans are seen as ignorant because they are ignorant. A prime example would be that Bush was elected president. Another would be that we still dont have satisfactory healthcare policies. Another would be that everyone preaching against socialism reaps the benefits of socialist programs everyday, like public school and water.

  89. Des Des
    May 3, 2011    

    Americans aren’t stupid…the people reading these and NOT thinking they are hilarious and witty are the stupid/ignorant ones. These are great – and I love how people LOVE to HATE America…the GREATEST COUNTRY EVER. Don’t believe me? That’s why people try SO hard to move here, because they want what we have: freedom, pride, power. And I think they are just jealous.

  90. Thinking Thinking
    May 3, 2011    

    American schools are so poor because, 1) teachers have the lowest SAT scores of anyone attending college and once they join the union (NEA) they can NEVER be fired ! 2) there are no academic or behavior standards in most American schools because if there were certain groups would either all fail or be expelled, and we can’t have that ! There are many other issues, but the above two are the most important, IMHO.

    • August 16, 2011    

      A good friend of mine and I are both currently in college and sutdying to become high school teachers. Both of us earned an ACT score of 33. If those are the lowest scores at our school, then us teachers with “low” standardized test scores seem to be doing a good job regardless.

    • August 17, 2011    

      Also, union membership does not mean that teachers can never be fired. While I agree that you have a point here, you are slightly mistaken on your facts. All teachers can always be fired regardless of union membership. The problem lies with the concept of tenure (additional benefits earned after working for one school or school district for a set amount of time). If the administration wants to fire a tenured teacher they have to do extra paperwork, go through extra investigations and work through extra processes which they would not have to deal with if the teacher had not earned tenure. Essentially, if a principal or superintendent wishes to fire a tenured teacher, they have to jump through more hoops than they would have to with a non-tenured teacher, which means more time, effort and money is spent on firing a teacher with tenure. This becomes a problem when school boards face budget cuts and must lay off teachers to make ends meet. Instead of assessing which teachers should be let go based on job performance, they base their decisions on tenure status. This means that a young, highly qualified teacher will be laid off before an older, less qualified teacher simply because it is easier to fire the younger teacher. I agree with you that this system is flawed and should be reformed. However, I believe that we should afford all teachers equal protection from being fired, regardless of tenure status, as opposed to giving school boards and principals the right to fire any teacher for no reason whatsoever.

  91. Jaja Jaja
    May 4, 2011    

    It’s so funny when someone says an entire country is ignorant, making a general assumption based on a few specific examples. Irony?

  92. Alexis Alexis
    May 4, 2011    

    Why do people think Americans are stupid? just because a group pf stupid people answer the question doesn’t mean all Americans are stupid. I know all of the answers to these questions and the ones in previous posts. yes most of us are ignorant. But some of us aren’t. You’re stereotyping, do all Brits or Irish drink? No. Do all Brits like the Harry Potter books? I think not! Are all Asians Chinese? No they aren’t. Stop stereotyping us and we will do the same to you.

  93. Insight Insight
    May 4, 2011    

    The only thing stupid about Americans is their uncanny desire to self-sabotage their own society. Too many Americans sit atop their pedestals and cast what they believe to be witty responses, acknowledging the lack of knowledge our “ignorant” country has in meaningless forums such as this one. It is surprising though that a society of, as commonly referred to on these posts, “stupid” people has managed to stumble into one of the most thriving economies in the world market. Actually, I dare say THE most thriving economy in the world market. Among this, an endless list of achievements that make the United States more a symbol of world envy than world animosity; this fact is often misconstrued. Now, on to make a point. At ‘European.’ Facts most certainly have agendas and even more certainly have biases. As a matter of fact, no pun intended, facts are rarely ever mentioned without an agenda, as in the case of your use of, “It is a fact that Americans…” Were you not attempting to use that “fact” to aid your AGENDA of proving to the other readers that America is, “lower than most other first world countries in education?” Also, your statement loses its ability to be factual with large amount of BIAS that you put in it. You said FAR lower than MOST other countries. Are these not extremely arbitrary words? Don’t the words ‘far lower’ and ‘most’ add further emphasis to what your particular opinion is on the matter? Could someone not make a separate, yet fair, assessment on the same data by which your fact was formed, and in perhaps their biased opinion conclude that Americans are ranked SLIGHTLY lower than SOME other nations? Facts have stronger agendas than any other combination of thought, as well as significant room for personal bias. Asymmetric information between the person knowledgeable of the fact, and the person receiving the fact cause this bias; i.e. it is fact that I am the tallest person in my room, it is also fact that I am the only person in this room, rendering the previously useful fact useless. Some survey’s may only conduct tests on the educated, and since many developed countries have far less stringent education policies than the U.S. this could potentially skew the data; as well as problems with random sampling. Lastly, America has adopted a highly forceful method to ensure that all children, of all backgrounds are enrolled in proper schooling with programs such as No Child Left Behind. So as it would seem, Americans are highly DIScontent with their “ignorance” and ironically, you seem to be the ignorant party on this particular subject. Sadly, European, you will probably never read this, and the few people that do read this will probably stop reading long before this point. Hopefully, someone will read this and consider what has been said; I hold an even higher hope that the person who does, at the very least, knows the difference between ignorant and stupid, as so few of the people that posted so far actually do. On a final note, to Andrew, the United States spends more money on healthcare than any other nation in the world. However, the life expectancy of American Citizens is strikingly average when compared to world figures. It’s a bit of a conundrum that despite this, increasing healthcare spending seems to still be one of the most sought after changes by political lobbyists. Perhaps it is the incorrect handling of Catch 22’s such as this one that truly define our “ignorance” in the eyes of the world.

  94. Nick Nick
    May 4, 2011    

    @ jerry

    1. I think you meant ” ‘their’ own history”-before you insult a country that is far superior to your own, brush up on your grammar.
    2. I have a hard time believing that a person of your stature, namely Canadian, could come close to being capable of naming any of the U.S.’s 50 states that don’t share a border with your culturally-devoid excuse for a country.
    3. I think nearly every American can name at least one founding father; school’s mandatory here until age 16, and that’s covered in the first grade curriculum. Make sure, when you finally come to your senses and decide to emigrate to the U.S., that you know at least one of the founders and the Pledge of Allegiance.
    4. Without jumping to Wikipedia, who was Lord Stanley?
    5. Refresh my memory, whose forces killed the world’s most dangerous terrorist, eh?

    • August 15, 2011    

      You’re an ignorant asshole. If you’re going to be that judgmental of anyone who disagrees with you, you are not going to get far.
      By the way, you didn’t kill the world’s most dangerous terrorist. All Canadians do not say ‘eh?’, you racist bastard. How can you behave that way and say that Canada is culturally devoid?
      It’s a shame that you have the answer to everything and you’re just sitting on your ass online, trying to be clever.
      Can you name every province of Canada? Is Wikipedia the only site you use to find information? It sure as hell is not mine. Do you have Canadian history sitting there in the back of your mind? How about India? How about China? How about France?
      You’re a fucking asshole. You put Americans to shame.

  95. Eric Eric
    May 4, 2011    

    You’re all losers. Just laugh and enjoy life… Don’t criticize it. We’re all dying anyway.

  96. Jen Jen
    May 4, 2011    

    I think it’s ridiculous how many people are bashing Americans. Not every American is stupid. The United States is one of the newest industrialized nations at only 234 years old. Other countries (like those in Europe) have had A LOT more time to work out their government programs. Ok, so our health care and capitalistic ideals are different; if you don’t like it, don’t live here. We’re also a lot bigger than European countries. Maybe this means more dumbasses, big deal. You can find them everywhere, not just the United States.

  97. WYLIEBOY WYLIEBOY
    May 4, 2011    

    No one gives a fuck about Canada eh?

  98. Laura Laura
    May 4, 2011    

    To say that all Americans are stupid would be to say that all Africans have AIDS and everyone from the middle east is a terrorist. Sweeping generalizations, though sometimes true, are never appropriate.

  99. jesse jesse
    May 5, 2011    

    may the 4th be with you

  100. mkay mkay
    May 5, 2011    

    At least one of the answers was a British person. You can tell because he/she said my MUM irons my TROUSERS.

  101. clay clay
    May 5, 2011    

    Go AMERICA!

  102. Hm. Hm.
    May 5, 2011    

    I don’t understand how some funny pictures of kids being silly on tests turns into an all-out internet world war…

  103. Fernando Fernando
    May 5, 2011    

    Get a life “insight”

  104. Wayne Wayne
    May 5, 2011    

    Most of those answers while wrong were very clever and amusing. They weren’t given by stupid people. They were given by bored people… I remember my schooling so well.

  105. Tara Tara
    May 5, 2011    

    These answers are hilarious! First and foremost I think you should all remember that. Second of all not all of these answers are from Americans. Obviously if you knew anything about culture and language you would understand that. You have to love ignorance in society…

  106. Cheese1 Cheese1
    May 5, 2011    

    Who’s to even say all of these are from schools in America? We aren’t the only country that takes tests in English, these could practically be from any country on this planet.

  107. Oleg Oleg
    May 5, 2011    

    Just because it says “Mum” and “Trousers” Doesn’t mean its british, it could be Australian, or maybe some other country.

  108. May 5, 2011    

    These are the kinds of answers my husband — who is very bright — used to write on his tests. I’d think a few of them might make teachers laugh, at least before they cracked the bottle.

  109. treseda treseda
    May 5, 2011    

    Obviously, some of the respondents to these tests grew up to make comments like these…

  110. USA USA
    May 6, 2011    

    Well, we still found Osama.
    USA USA USA

  111. Bobbert Bobbert
    May 6, 2011    

    guys…
    most of these are fake,
    get over it.

  112. Quota Quota
    May 6, 2011    

    Being a teacher myself…it is questions like these that keep my liquor cabinet filled

  113. Spaceboss Spaceboss
    May 6, 2011    

    @ Insight- I read the whole thing and greatly appreciated your trenchant insight. And yes, ignorant and dumb are far from synonymous. Ignorant means not knowing a specific fact while dumb means unintelligent (or the inability to speak.) @Jeremy- Nice ironic scalpel! Although Josh’s use of the word Amerika may have been intentional to suggest a correlation between our country and the former Soviet Union, intimating fascism. @ All the country-bashers- Sweeping generalizations on all sides. Are we not all citizens of the world? A global community? You might want to stop being so small minded and take a look at the top of a calendar. It’s 2011. Jingoism and nationalism are becoming less relevant as our respective countries’ borders are becoming “virtually” non-existent thanks to the World Wide Web. Information is power and can no longer be suppressed. Why can’t human beings recognize that the similarities between ourselves are greater than the differences? One love.

  114. May 6, 2011    

    If these aren’t fake, these are masterpieces.

  115. Miller Miller
    May 6, 2011    

    In case you didn’t realize, this page was meant to be for laughs.

    The answers these test takers gave are not necessarily wrong. They’re all just different answers to a question. So, get a life and quit being so jealous of the country that basically runs the world.

    America is stupid. Really?

    Maybe we are, but you say we know nothing about your history.
    Neither do you.
    Remember WWI?
    How about WWII?

    Yeah, we do.

    The reason we know little about European history is because they forget how we saved them not once, but twice.
    As far as knowing Canada’s geography, why does that matter? How many Canadians know the Capital of Saudi Arabia? Maybe 1 out of the 10 people that live in Canada.

    We may not be the smartest here in America, but we find solutions to problems. They’re not always the best solutions. The poorest solution is better than no solution.

  116. Martijn Martijn
    May 6, 2011    

    It gave me a lot of laughs. Especially the Find X. That’s worth an A.

    Thanks
    Martijn
    The Netherlands found by StumbleUpon

  117. Steve Steve
    May 6, 2011    

    Funny thing is i used to do that. What else are you going to do if you just CANNOT get the answer or just don’t give a fuck.

  118. Bzizzle Bzizzle
    May 7, 2011    

    These are real. Any teacher knows that.

  119. meg meg
    May 7, 2011    

    They should not have used the term race for the malaysian question and I want to slap the boy who wrote “She’s a woman” but the rest were pretty funny.

  120. Alex Alex
    May 7, 2011    

    Laughed a lot thanks

  121. marco marco
    May 7, 2011    

    yep, that’s why i drink.
    In Dutch:
    Jawel, dat is de reden dat ik drink!
    trouwens ook gewoon omdat het lekker is.

  122. Joshua Joshua
    May 7, 2011    

    This is really funny I got to admit. I am a student and personally never put something stupid like that, but Ive seen kids put that and the teacher just flips XD

  123. May 7, 2011    

    Yes and Fox News aka Hoax news is journalism
    Pappy Bush wasn’t a nazi, Osama never receive weapons from the US etc…

  124. Emily Emily
    May 7, 2011    

    Actually a lot of them aren’t fake. I’m a teacher and a tutor and I get answers like this all time, particularly on the pretests I give to check content knowledge.

  125. May 8, 2011    

    LOL LMAFO. FInd x…. Here it is. Thats my favorite.

  126. Sergio Sergio
    May 8, 2011    

    looool she’s a woman! 😀

  127. rich tastingcum rich tastingcum
    May 8, 2011    

    fake or not, i had a good chuckle with them.

  128. mnie mnie
    May 9, 2011    

    Bobbert, have a feeling you’re not a teacher if you think these are fake?…

  129. May 9, 2011    

    These are hilarious, and if they’re not real, they probably should be. I used to score essays for different states that used those kinds of questions that have many ways to answer, mostly incorrectly by the students, and they can come up with the funniest answers when they really don’t have a clue what the answer is. My idea about teaching is that if they don’t know the answer at least putting in something crazy or funny is better than leaving it blank, and showing that they are really airheads, and know nothing at all from their learning experience. If they didn’t do this, you’d have nothing to chuckle about when you’re grading their tests.

  130. becca becca
    May 10, 2011    

    lol my math teacher showed the find x one to us it was super funny!

  131. Alchemist Alchemist
    May 10, 2011    

    Who cares if they’re fake – they’re bloody funny.
    I bet most of them are real to be honest. I used to teach Occupational Health and Safety and some of the answers I got were incredible – they were adults as well.
    One of the best was a guy who was convinced that acne was an occupational disease of taxi-cab drivers.

  132. May 11, 2011    

    There are some pretty good ones here. I used to think some responses were made up until I started working with high school students and noticed some of their clever responses. Take a look http://sillyresponses.blogspot.com/ – these are real responses from my real students :)

  133. dg dg
    May 11, 2011    

    where the **** is the like button

  134. Miss D Miss D
    May 11, 2011    

    OMG – I sooo needed this! I’ve saved my favorite rediculous responses over the years – Never tire of them – always a laugh! Thank you!

  135. KeySuhrada KeySuhrada
    May 18, 2011    

    the one with the blue graph lines is fake to me…unless they like traced it or something…and blocked it out with white paper so it would be clear …smh.

  136. blah bitch blah bitch
    May 21, 2011    

    keysuhrada….. who the hell cares? it was funny anyway.

  137. MissSmith MissSmith
    May 23, 2011    

    Real or not…this was too funny! I find it hilarious because there have got to be some stories that k-12 teachers have got to share that would attest to the ridiculous answer they see on exams and assignments.

  138. lol lol
    May 23, 2011    

    I think some of these pics are fake, but anyway they are awesome 😀

  139. Neill Neill
    May 24, 2011    

    I should go find the test where a student of mine identified Greenland as “China” and a lake in Upper Mongolia as “Benito Mussolini.” And this was a JUNIOR. In UNIVERSITY. God help us all.

  140. thom thom
    May 24, 2011    

    @ Miss D: I hope to god you’re not an English teacher, that would be rIdiculous.

  141. May 25, 2011    

    hahahahahahaha

  142. Savannah Savannah
    May 28, 2011    

    So funny! I know what I’m answering on my science fill in the blank tests: Because thats how God made it! :)

  143. Travis Travis
    June 2, 2011    

    LMFAO. “She’s a woman.”

  144. Jalin Jalin
    June 6, 2011    

    Hahahahaha, I use to do this kinda stuff on tests in high school! Improv ftw!

  145. Matt Matt
    June 6, 2011    

    All of you seriously need to stop complaining about today’s youth. People always comment about how lazy teenagers have become. For some, this is true, but the teenagers are dealing with a course load that is extremely difficult in comparison to the majority of what you adults have been taught. Perhaps, it makes you all feel better about your own lives by complaining about ours.

  146. NotAlNorm NotAlNorm
    June 9, 2011    

    In twenty years of teaching middle school English, social studies, and gifted ed., the funniest one I ever came across was the sweet, sincere effort by one of my more spelling- challenged 7th graders on her states test: Along the East Coast of the US it seems we are blessed with Penisvana and Vagina. Evidently the Mason-Dixon Line was some early form of birth control. And no, I am NOT making this up and her spelling miscues were totally honest.

  147. Richy Richy
    June 9, 2011    

    I live in jersey and my teacher was the best because he drank alot… all the time… I think even in class

  148. A student A student
    June 14, 2011    

    Hey guys i like arguing too.

  149. Aithne Aithne
    June 14, 2011    

    This was funny. The comments, well, they were not. It seems a lot of people were anxious to give their opinion, and there seems also to be a divide between generations. I don’t understand it and I think it’s really sad that so many youth are disappointed in the adults around them and so many adults disappointed in the youth. I don’t see much of a difference from my youth. I do, however, believe that it’s the school systems that are failing, but the kids are doing all they can to make it anyway. And I wish them the best of luck, because they’ll need it. We’ve really screwed the pooch as far as the economy goes, and I hope there’s some genius CREATIVE THINKER (like the kids who wrote these answers) that can get our tails out of the fire. 😉

    BTW “Amerika” is a derogatory way of spelling America that is intentional, and is meant to embody the presumed ignorance of the average American citizen, from what I can gather. I’ve seen it many times, always in a negative comment, usually on a blog post like this one… Just thought I’d mention that.

  150. dan dan
    June 14, 2011    

    just putting it out there that these kids aren’t stupid. they are likely on par with the rest of their peers actually. they are only lazy and/or are just having some fun. for all you know these are just on some test at the end of the year that the kid didnt even need to pass.

  151. IrishLad IrishLad
    June 15, 2011    

    This is hilarious. I have read every single comment and,with the exception ofJesse and Josh, everyone is more concerned with attacking Europeans than defending America. There are a few unbelievably stupid people in America. Not all are completely stupid, I get that. But Josh is fluent in at least two languages. So what if his grammar is not as good as someone who has been speaking English for 14 years, give him a break? English is quite possibly the hardest language to learn as a second language. I speak Irish and English and I still get the two mixed up having started learning both roughly 12 years ago. Languages are difficult to master! As a general rule, I have found that Americans from inner cities are more stupid than those from upper class areas. I have found the same problem with English, Scottish, Welsh, Irish etc. The common denominator does not appear to be Americans. Granted, you`re secondary level schools seem inferior to our ones, but anyone who goes to these schools and puts in effort, will prevail! This is the same everywhere. Children of this generation are becoming lazier? The rejection of knowledge is stupidity to me. That`s pretty much all I have to say.
    Europeans- Give Americans a break.
    Americans- Give Europeans a break.

  152. Warren Warren
    June 17, 2011    

    I am a teacher. I think that these answers are creative, but they would so not get credit in my classroom. I would applaud their efforts and laugh with them about it, but some of these things are unacceptable answers. I don’t think kids write all these things down because teachers have been negligent, I think sometimes they don’t take the time to listen to what we are trying to teach them. Not that all teachers are perfect or even good. The children of today are not lazy nor stupid they are creative to say the least. Children today are more infatuated with what goes on in the world then what we teach in the classroom. I don’t think a bunch of Americans should be trashing our next generations, they will one day be our leaders.

  153. Ronnie Ronnie
    June 19, 2011    

    Why does every post have to have people trying to sound smarter than one another. You people are ridiculous. Try just enjoying the comedy of it all and move on. I don’t care if you think there’s a hidden meaning in it. I don’t care who has better grammar. Get off your computer and read a book, or cure cancer if you’re so smart. I’m sick of seeing stuck up faggots (sorry to the gay community, but that’s the only way I could describe these people) post stupid rebuttals against each other. You’re smart, I get it. Cock suckers! Now you got me posting stuff and I never do. Just stick with what you mostly do on the computer and jack off.

  154. AmericanCollegeGirl AmericanCollegeGirl
    June 19, 2011    

    Disclaimer: I have no regard whatsoever for my grammar in this post. Do not attack my grammar as opposed to my comment because as a former debater that will just piss me off and make you look stupid.

    Firstly, I’d like to say that some of the people are right, youth now seem not to give two shits about education and yes the education system in the US have drastically dropped in efficiency. But let’s be real, this isn’t anything new, there is a general culture of anti-intellectualism in our country among ALL US citizens, not just the youth. Of course, it would be a sweeping generalization to say that most of the people in our country are unintelligent fucks, but let’s not criticize to the youth while half the politicians are hanging on to their common sense by a string.

    And how can you really blame kids for not caring about their education when the majority of them are put aside or ignored. If they aren’t upper middle class white kids who are seen as ‘the future of our country’ very little of this countries resources or care is given to them. I was fortunate enough to see both realities, I went to a terribly funded overcrowded public school and also went to an elite nationally renowned all girls private school. In both places I saw students with the drive to learn and absorb everything around them, the difference was as opposed to the public school, the private school (which was 25k a year) actually had the resources and impetus to foster and facilitate that drive. No wonder the majority of students in the public school system don’t know where the Pacific ocean is on the map, half the schools can’t afford them, and if they can, they are outdated and inefficient when there are 30+ students in the class room.

    Also, in response to the parent comment, sure parents are a large part of the success of an educational system, but let’s be honest here the schools and teachers have a large responsibility to FOSTER that relationship between the family and the school. You can’t expect all parents to come from an educationally enriched background, and you also can’t put the educational success of the student on the parent. An inspired and passionate teacher can make up for a lack of parental guidance and there are plenty of students who are successful in school independent of their parents involvement in their education. In my opinion most of the responsibility of academic success, even at a young age, lies with the school and the teachers if it didn’t then we wouldn’t need schools.

    Oh, and I’d like to say that just because most kids can’t recite the Declaration of Independence by heart or place all the states on the map doesn’t mean kids are stupid. Sure, it’s unfortunate that some very basic things like Geography and grammar are not being stressed in schools but think of the other things that we students can do that older generations can’t. How many Boomers and Gen Xers can create their own website, or Photoshop pictures to look almost professional. Other than the 30 to 40 somethings that get paid to do that sort of thing, most wouldn’t know how. But ask your average suburban sixth grader to make an excel worksheet for you or an power point presentation with graphics, videos, hyperlinks, and animation they probably could and would think you were dumb for asking.

    Our strengths are different, technology in our forte, but don’t make sweeping generalizations about our doomed youth when there are so many variable to consider that affect educational opportunities and changing ideas of what is valuable knowledge.

    And in a buisness world, what’s more valuable to know? How to put together a professional presentation or a spreadsheet, or knowing wherer Bosnia and Herzegovina is on a map?

  155. Mary Mary
    June 20, 2011    

    Although Josh certainly made a poor case for his arguments by relying too much on rants and insults, I must point out that he is attempting to bring attention to the fact that American education is sadly neglected in many schools/areas which has in fact led to unimaginable numbers of students, particularly current teens, who are unaccountably ignorant of basic subjects, skills, and intellectual maturity that is so crucial in the competitive markets of the world, not to mention the success of every individual human being in life. However, much more damage is done to the quality of the mind of the average American citizen by the materialistic shallow culture and media of the U.S. than the failures of the education system.

  156. Robert Robert
    June 20, 2011    

    Hey I’m not here to argue over who’s smart or dumb. I’m just wondering if anyone has links to more of these hilarious answers. Please don’t critizie my grammar or spelling. It’s the internet and I hardly give a rats ass. Thanks! :-)

  157. June 27, 2011    

    Im so glad my teachers all had senses of humor and gave me points or at least marked a “haha” “very funny” etc etc for whizzy answers or hilarious art work to accompany my test. Its called being out of the box people, reminders that we aren’t drones being pushed through an educational system, we are human. Although I know how frowned upon that can be by a lot of teachers..

  158. June 28, 2011    

    Damn seems like I missed some funny arguments here xD

  159. July 6, 2011    

    I love how this turned into something that has nothing to do with the witty responses from students….

  160. July 21, 2011    

    these all come from a published book “F in Exams: The Very Best Totally Wrong Test Answers”

  161. August 15, 2011    

    Wow, you guys.
    “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” – Albert Einstein.

    One mistake does not make someone stupid. Yes, there are grammar mistakes and spelling mistakes in these posts. Do you know why? It’s the internet, no one really gives a fuck. If spelling mistakes are all you can find wrong with an argument, then you’re pretty stupid yourself.
    Give everyone a fucking chance. Besides, I guarantee that these are kids who were just fucking around because they didn’t study.
    Also, I think it’s okay that teachers drink. Teachers are just people; some teachers drink and some architects drink. They don’t need to feel ashamed or reconsider their entire lives and career paths simply because they get stressed and perhaps turn to alcohol while stressed.

    Also, fuck you if all you can find wrong with my arguments is a couple grammar mistakes, fowl language, and spelling errors. Ask anyone who scores AP exams and they will tell you content gets you more points than structure.

    Last but not least, I repeat: It’s the fucking internet, no one gives a damn. Get over yourselves.

    Or, for those of you who can only comprehend simple arguments: Its teh fuckin’ interwebz, no1 gives a dam. get ov’r urselves.

    (I did that last bit on purpose, my brain cells didn’t suddenly rot. Get on with your lives.)

    • August 17, 2011    

      I agree. The fact that they nitpicked the shit out of the grammar is because he made a valid point. And what to people do when someone tells them what’s what and they have no witty come-back? The attack the person.

      I personally love the use of your fucking “fowl” language. Got ‘the bird’ pun ‘flipped’ right in there.

      And everyone that attacks GRAMARZ on teh interbuts is a fucking HIPPOcrit. YOU ALL STILL USE THE FUCKING ACRONYM ‘LOL’ WITHOUT ITS RESPECTIVE PERIOD BREAKS. JUST FUCKING SAY HAHAHA YOU TWATS.

  162. September 5, 2011    

    classic. these never get old

  163. September 16, 2011    

    Excellent collection! I would read something like this, all day long, :)

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