Dizzy Dee

Everyone is disappointed at some point or another. And its even worse if you love the person and they you. Why are we disappointed? Obviously because we expect something more or different, and then don’t receive the wanted attention, or expected behavior. This might be due to a lack of communication or even just because the other person was selfish or inconsiderate.

Whatever the reason, it is more important to learn to deal with it. Not as a couple. But you, and I as individuals. Even if the other party doesn’t apologize or show regret. To remain emotionally healthy yourself, you need to forgive the person, and move on, right? Right… Its not always so easy.

It is very important to realize that we cannot hold other people responsible for what we feel. What you feel is up to you. If you were disappointed, you should review your expectations of the other person? Is it fair? Sometimes the other person was really at fault, but very often it was just a difference of mindset.

Your girlfriend might like it if you text her to say goodnight every single night, but to you it seems senseless to send the same message each night? She will take offense if you tell her that you feel you’re waisting your money - its the thought that counts, remember? The point is we all have different outlooks on life, and to merge that and remain happy is tricky.

It is important to be realistic about your expectations. Your boyfriend will not give up his sport for you every single weekend. Abandon childish demands and foolish expectations. Most guys love their sport, and for them to give it up, is like to ask of you to give up your make-up. It ain’t gonna happen. Be fair about what you expect!

Admit to yourself that you had expectations that were not met, and then move on. Forgive the person. Talk about your expectations to the ‘disappointer’, and tell them how you feel. Most of the time the disappointment might be over something that isn’t such a major issue in any case. Try to think to yourself if you would still be angry with that person if they were lying on their death bed. Would you be willing to forgive them then? Would you be willing to see it over? If you would, then it wasn’t such a big deal really!!

Relationships so often turn into what I WANT. What I NEED. And what is important to ME. Make sure that you keep yourself focussed on the other person. Remember things that are important to THEM. If you are still unhappy in the end, you should consider the worth of the relationship altogether.